no matter how deep we're going, in that dark fearful forest, on that bumpy road full of holes, 

always,

always, 

it will always wait for us.

but what happens if we're walking through a desert?

a wide empty desert. 

will the surprises we anticipate so much wait for us too? if so, where will it hide? 

living without obstacles, excitements or dilemma is a bore. 

even though we want that so much when we're going through hardships. 

and when we're living life, doing nothing; nothing to anticipate, just waiting for something but not sure what it is, sitting at home doing nothing, no obstacles and stuff, 

we will feel empty. 

don't you realize that the obstacles we go through, the excitements we face, both of it is what's going to mold us. define us. it is a process of finding ourselves. of finding the truth. of finding out what is right and what is wrong. 

we cannot learn all of this simply by doing nothing. 

we want to rest. we want to hibernate. 

but we can only do that for a while. it will take only a matter of time until we will feel bored, empty, useless because we're not doing anything. 

to you, who is reading this, you might have experienced this in a way. 

for me,

waiting to get into college or university after spm results came out felt like being lost in a desert. not knowing what to do. not so sure on where to go next. it's like you're just following the sun in the heat. it's a pain. it becomes more of a pain when you can't get a part time job. it's like you sleep, not anticipating anything at all the next day and wake up feeling the same way like yesterday. you feel like a robot. it's a pain. a pain. 

and for some people, feeling empty might result in being sad. 

overthinking, overthinking, overthinking. who am I? what the hell am I doing here? 

sometimes also thinking, what's happening out there? 

sometimes you feel like you forgot what the clouds swaying between the clear blue sky looks like. 

sometimes you feel like you forgot the scent of the air after it rains. 

sometimes you feel like you forgot how the trees dance along with the wind. 

sometimes you feel like you forgot what happy faces look like. 

it's a pain. what a pain. it's such a pain. 

but darling, 

I can promise you this. 

make the most of that time now. 

find your inner peace. find yourself. find Allah. sharpen yourself so you can be ready for what's coming ahead of you. keep walking through that desert, dig that pile of sand, you might find something valuable, you might discover a treasure or water you're thirsting so much. gain knowledge. read good books. watch inspiring movies. watch documentaries. have constructive conversations with your parents, your siblings. discuss topics you've never talked about before. I'm sure, you'll find something useful. I can promise you this.

you might want to go out and see your friends, people who can make you laugh, people who can make you whole. I can promise you that there will be a time where you can meet them and when that time comes, cherish it. cherish it with your whole damn heart. you'll feel content for once. I can promise you this. hold on to it. hold on to it please. 

life will may be monochrome to you afterwards but I can promise you, that you'll find the thrill you've been waiting for so long, the excitement that you're longing for will come to you soon. be ready for it because you'll crave for free time when it happens and you'll regret not spending your free time wisely. I know so. 

and one day, you'll find yourself at the end of that desert. you'll find a stream of water, or probably a waterfall with tropical trees, who knows. 

the thrill you've been seeking is finally here, right in front of your eyes.

and when that time comes, what I want you to tell yourself is: 

"I'm ready."